Now. Now. Now. I want to know NOW!
I’m waiting right now. I’m anxiously, imperfectly, nervously, insecurely, excitedly, waiting to hear if what I want to happen will, in fact, come to pass.
There’s nothing I can do to speed up the time or to know WHAT the outcome will be and it made me think that maybe there are some other people out there who are also standing by and waiting. Maybe they are waiting for a child to be born, waiting to hear if they got the job, waiting to see if it will rain on their vacation, waiting to find out the results of a test, or sitting by their phone, waiting for the cute guy from the bar to text back.
Then it hit me- aren’t I always waiting for something?? I am trying to think back to a point in my life where I wasn’t thinking “What will happen?” and I truly cannot think of a time. It doesn’t matter how content I’ve been or what amazing (or challenging) events are happening in my life, I’m always WAITING!
So, maybe there’s something more to it than just the passing of time. Maybe the universe doesn’t give you (or not give you) things right away because there’s a lesson to learn in the meantime. I have to think this is true. Even if that’s a bunch of bull-hockey, isn’t it a better way to spend your time waiting?
The truth is, things may not turn out the way I want them to. I may not get what I want. Does that discredit me in any way? Does that change my self-worth? Does it make my life any less of a miracle? No. It doesn’t. I think maybe we could use the time “before we know” to focus on being grateful for what we have now- to be grateful for life as it is, before the change (or no change). I think in this way, we can prepare ourselves for any outcome, knowing that we have been and will continue to be taken care of- most of the time in ways that we couldn’t have imagined for ourselves.
Anyhoo, I’ll be over here waiting and trying to be happy about it if anyone wants to join me.